Interactions & Connections: Following a Child’s Lead in Conversation—A Texas Deafblind Project Video Guide
Authors: Members of the Texas Deafblind Project: Heather Lightfoot, Transition Consultant; Edgenie Bellah, Family Engagement Coordinator; and Hillary Keys, Early Childhood Consultant
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Interaction is for Everyone
The core idea of interaction being for everyone is woven into the fabric of deafblind education, which emphasizes that every person, regardless of their sensory challenges, can and should be part of a meaningful and interactive world. The Texas Deafblind Project promotes that interaction is for everyone. Heather Withrow, Deafblind Transition Consultant, tells us that “it doesn’t matter about your hearing, your vision, sensory differences, disabilities, or other medical issues. It’s just part of being human.”
The Interactions & Connections: Following Your Child’s Lead with Your Conversation video is a collaborative project between the Texas Deafblind Project and the Statewide Outreach Center at the Texas School for the Deaf. In the new video, Heather and her colleagues, Edgenie Bellah and Hillary Keys, explore how small, intentional moments can transform the way we connect with children and young adults who are deafblind, blind, or have low vision.
This video blends heart and know-how—offering practical insights wrapped in real-life stories. Families and professionals alike will leave inspired and ready to put these strategies into action.
The Serve and Return of Connection
Interactions are more than just talking. This notion is validated by the work of Barbara Miles and the Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University. The Center’s “serve and return” model explains that “serve and return turn-taking is the foundation for building resiliency.” Like tossing a ball back and forth, each “serve” from one person is met with a “return” from the other, creating a rhythm of understanding and trust.
One of the most beautiful outcomes is what Dr. Jan van Dijk called moments of joy, shared experiences when both partners are fully present and engaged. “You can’t teach that to a child,” Heather says. “It just comes from within, and interaction really supports that.”
Following the Child’s Lead
In the video, Heather shares a vivid story about her son, Orion, who was recovering from a leg fracture. One day, he started hopping through the house on one leg. Heather followed, not knowing where he was headed. They passed chairs, beds, and the kitchen table until they reached the bathroom sink. Orion’s whole body relaxed as he turned on the water to wash his hands.
“At the beginning of this interaction, I didn’t know what he wanted,” Heather recalls. “I just had to follow him…and finally, I could see when we were where he wanted to be.”
It’s a perfect example of how connection deepens when we step into the child’s world and let them set the course.
The Power of Touch
Drawing from Barbara Miles’ (2018) work, Heather explains in the video that for deafblind people, hands are a primary means of communication and information, serving as a way for them to “read or listen” to others. She adds that this concept of touch extends beyond the hands to any part of the body, and always requires respect, trust, and permission.
The video also introduces copresence, the practice of maintaining physical connection during an interaction so both partners can follow each other’s actions without having to reestablish contact constantly. This physical and emotional presence supports shared learning and problem-solving.
Steps for Building Quality Interactions
The team shares Bernadette van den Tillart’s (2015) five steps for deepening connection:
- Recognize—Notice the person’s initiation and presume competence.
- Contact—Greet and seek permission to join.
- Serve and Return—Follow their lead for at least three turns.
- Goodbye Ritual—Signal closure in a meaningful way.
- End Contact—Step back or use agreed-upon cues for leaving or returning.
These steps, shown in real-life video clips, make it easy to see how to put the ideas into practice.
Repair Matters More Than Perfection
The video also covers the rupture and repair cycle—the natural process of small breakdowns in communication and the trust-building that comes when we fix them. “Making up is more important than messing up,” says Dr. Suzanne Zeedyk (2021). “The process of repairing not only builds resilience in each person, but also builds trust in the relationship” (Adoption UK Scotland, 2021).
Why You’ll Want to Watch
You’ll see moments that make you smile, nod, and maybe even rethink how you approach a conversation—from a child’s quiet initiation, to the joy of a shared laugh, to the gentle patience of waiting for a serve to become clear. You’ll hear why Gunnar Vege’s reminder—“It is the interested person that becomes the person of interest”—is so powerful in the deafblind community.
And most importantly, you’ll come away with the tools and inspiration to make every interaction richer, whether at home, in the classroom, or in the community.
Watch the full video here: Texas Deafblind Project: Interactions and Connections
Heather Lightfoot signing interactions and connections.
References:
Adoption UK Scotland. (2021). Dr. Suzanne Zeedyk on the rupture/repair cycle. Dr Suzanne Zeedyk on the Rupture/Repair Cycle
Belote, M. (2022). Strategies for creating communication-rich environments for children who are deafblind. California Deafblind Services. https://cadeafblind.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/02/Fact-Sheet-Strategies-for-Creating-Communication-Rich-Environments-for-Children-who-are-Deafblind-.pdf
Center for the Developing Child at Harvard University. (2025). A guide to serve and return. https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resource-guides/guide-serve-and- return/
Miles, B. (2018). Genuine conversations: A path to lifelong learning for both partners. Studies in deafblindness for the advanced practitioner: With Barbara Miles. Texas Deafblind Project. https://txdeafblindproject.org/products/podcasts-webinars/ interviews/
National Consortium on Deaf-Blindness. (2007). Harmonious interactions. Practice oodPerspectives—Highlighting Information in Deaf-Blindness. (1) June 2007. https://www.nationaldb.org/media/doc/Harmonious-Interactions_LP.pdf
National Institute for Play. (2024). Attunement play. Retrieved May 23, 2024, from https://nifplay.org/what-is-play/types-of-play/attunement-play/#:~:text=Attunement%20
Pfitzer, S. (Host). (2022, February 22). Building resilience through play. In The Brain Architects Podcast. Center for the Developing Child, Harvard University. https://developingchild.harvard.edu/resources/podcast-resilience-play/
van den Tillart, B. (2015). Tactile reciprocal interactions & BETs. Symposium on Deafblind Education. https://library.tsbvi.edu/Play/13204
Zeedyk, S. (2016). Babies come into the world already connected to other people…. The Science of Human Connection. https://suzannezeedyk.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/Suzanne-Zeedyk-Babies-Connected-v2.pdf